WTF is ethical gooning?
Rules for gooning??
No AI gooning???
Whatever the fuck I want.
Support small creators?
What if I wanna jerk-off to Sophie Rain and mainstream porn stars?
No gatekeeping.
Okay.
Be open-minded.
I think I am.
Depends of who you ask.
Lube up.
Does spit count?
Beware of the current political and economic climate??
Is it supposed to turn me on or most likely off??
WTF it has to do with gooning?
What about climate change?
GOONING IN PUBLIC
If we follow these rules as our new guidelines to live and die to.
We, ethical gooners and wannabes, can all continue to jerk-off in public??!!
“Ethical Gooners”
Well,
I will save time describing the above video by saying its a well-dressed young man trying too much to be funny AND intelligent.
Apart from a few definitions of the term there is nothing there.
The only thing I’ve learned about “ethical gooning” is that those wankers seem to only jerk-off to ANIME???
Why not trying human porn for a change? We have good stuff too.
Ethical gooners don’t want to jerk-off to “AI art“…
Some even tap “-ai_generated” before jerking-off???
WHY NOT JUST JERKING-OFF TO WHAT YOUR DICK WANT??
Most of us, regular people, don’t ask ourself why, what, from where it come from before “gooning”.
No need for this bullshit!!
Why make it complicate when all you have to do is..
Just Jerk-Off™
(My own trademarked version of Just Do It. Where’s my check now? Sneaker line coming next season.)
Ethical Gooning Society (EGS)
View this post on Instagram
Horse Girl Gooning
Yes, it seems that it’s a real thing?!
The video is a pure platitude. Another jackass trying to be funny and intelligent but failed miserably at both.
Furry, My Little Pony wankers..
According to the sacred ‘Ethical Gooning Commandments’.
You’re okay to goon on My Little Pony since it wasn’t AI-generated.
Don’t point your finger at me. I’m just the messenger.
I’m not associated with them.
The only horse girl I know is Monica Mattos. And she is more human than human.
Personally, my only rule for gooning is to not do it in public or in a place I could get caught/see.
A no-brainer.
But, apparently, some sickos enjoy gooning in public??
Goonicide
The Nautica Malone Documentary
First and foremost, Trey Sellers, the insincere organizer of Gooniversary, is an attention whore willing to do anything, legal or not, to get some clout and views.
“An incident bigger than 9/11.” – Trey Sellers, Gooneral organizer
This is the story of Nautica Malone, a gooner, who ordered a coffee at a Bikini Barista while he was pantless naked in his car with his hand placed in between.
One too many time.
This time, the exhibitionist was filmed and the video did goes viral.
Humiliated, Nautica Malone commited suicide leaving his wife and two kids behind.
Gooning is the NBA of Masturbation.
Now there is a Gooniversary every year to celebrate the death of this gooning martyr who got caught with his pants down.
Pardon me, but I don’t feel particularly sorry for Nautica Malone.
First, he didn’t had any business ordering his coffee while pantless and most likely playing with his dick.
Second, taking his own life was an overreaction.
And yes, I think the Bikini Barrista girl did the good thing by exposing (pun intended) this wanker online.
The Family Left Behind
Further worse, this farcical memorial and the media circus surrounding it just plunged his grieving family back into this nightmare all over again.
All so a shameless influencer can chase a little more clout.
Supposedly, all profits will go to a suicide prevention lifeline…
Sure they will.
I will end this Masterpiece of a blogpost with my ultimate answer to ethical gooners.
Just Jerk-Off™
T-Shirts for sale on PYGear.com
Sources:
https://www.reddit.com/r/bangalore/comments/1qght45/just_bangalore_things/
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